Maybe dating a younger guy makes you feel sexier – as though you have something other women don’t, but your strong, alpha male boyfriend who held much promise may well turn out to be quite a challenge – a sigma male.
Sigma males a law unto themselves
The Sigma Male loves to play the field, and traditional relationships aren’t his cup of tea. So what are sigma males and why should you care? EQ offers dating and relationship advice regarding the sigma male, particularly if you have long-term dating on your mind.
They’re free-spirited, adventure-seeking, exciting, happy-go-lucky guys who have no intention of settling into a white-picket-fence lifestyle. They can be romantic, of course, and are extremely attractive to women, being strong, silent, lone-wolf types.
If you want to put pressure on the sigma male to put a wedding ring on your finger, you’re pursuing the wrong guy as the sigma guy never wants to be encumbered by societal expectations.
Not ready for commitment
You may be ready to move in with your young partner but he may not be ready. He’s 28 and you’re 40 and he just hasn’t experienced life the way you have.
Your boyfriend may not be ready for all the responsibilities that come with a committed relationship. Many women mistakenly think that if they date a man, he will reward them with his commitment and love, but many men aren’t ready for a commitment until they are over 30.
You might want to spend the weekend moving in and setting up your apartment and all he can think of is paragliding or dirt-biking with his friends this weekend.
Anything in common?
It goes without saying that the bigger the age gap, the harder it will be to have things in common. As an older woman, you might enjoy listening to Vera Lynn singing 2nd World War songs, whereas he may like bands such as Pupil Slicer and Urne – bands that give you the heebie-jeebies.
You may think that your music tastes aren’t the end of the world as each one brings something different to the relationship. However, you don’t want to be so different that you don’t have anything in common really and you discover that you can’t relate.
Are you OK with the sniggering?
While you shouldn’t really care about what people say and think about your older women/younger man relationship, the fact is, you’re always going to be coming up against sniggering people. You have to know whether you can cope with that.
People are uncomfortable with disparities, even the other way around, with older men and young girls. They don’t like seeing something ‘abnormal.’
Wherever you go, you will be getting snide looks and sometimes verbal abuse and you have to know whether you can cope with that, as it is one of the challenges of dating a younger man.
You’re looked upon as a mother figure
Successful, happy couples come from all backgrounds and there’s nothing to say that you won’t have a fabulous life with a younger man. However, significant age gaps can bring on some challenges.
It may seem glamorous for an older woman to have a younger boyfriend, there are challenges that the age disparity brings. There will be differences in terms of personality and maturity and as an older woman, you might want to take charge and this will put him off as he sees you as a mother figure instead of a friend and lover.
Going out with a guy from a different generation to yours does have its pitfalls and it’s quite possible that it’s what the younger generation finds exciting that leaves you stone cold.